Conversation with Shern - 5 Years 2 Months

Shern: Daddy, please help me to build the tracks for my Lego train.
(Daddy went to help him build, but then later asked Shern to help)
Daddy: Come, let us build together.
Shern: I'm lazy.
Daddy: I'm lazy too.
Shern: Daddy, never ever give up ok. Build halfway already then you must never ever give up.
(Shern went on to sing the Never Ever Give Up song from Thomas & Friends!)
Daddy: "_"

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I took Shern for a haircut at his usual hair salon.
Me: Shern, please look straight so that aunty can see properly and will cut nicely. And also please close your mouth, if not later the hair will go inside your mouth.
Shern: I'm in jail.
Me: What jail?
Shern: Yes, in jail cannot move and talk and my hands are also hidden underneath this big cloth.
Me: lol.


and then 5 mins later....Aunty was holding his ear a little to shave the hair on top of his ear.


Shern: Aunty, that is my ear. Please cut my hair and not my ears. But don't cut me until botak ahh...
Aunty: No botak la, your hair is still here. Will cut the same like Daddy's hair ok?
Shern: Then I will look like daddy.
Aunty: Hair same only, face not same. So won't look like daddy.
Shern: Yes, when I am big then I will look like Daddy with same hair.
Aunty: "_"

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Me: Shern, please don't put your leg up the balcony rails. If you fall down, you will die.
Shern: Mummy, it is ok because I am going up to Heaven when I die.
(oh no, this is not right. Later he thinks that death is something ok. So I need to think of some way to explain to him)
Me: If you do not listen to instructions or do silly things and you die, you will NOT go to Heaven.
Shern: Then I will go to Hell arr?
Me: Yes, if you do not listen to mummy and then climb up and fall down and die, then Heaven is not for naughty children.
(Shern thinks for awhile and then said)
Shern: I know, if I never look right and left, and right again when I cross the road and the car bangs into me, then I will not get to go to heaven.
If I got look right and left, and then right again, and the car bangs me, then I will go to Heaven. Am I right?
Me: Yes, you are right. Because you didn't do silly things.

(Looks like he got the concept alright. Phew. Kids these days ahh.....give me heart attack)

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